Hady Barry

At 13, I became responsible for the care of my three younger siblings, the youngest of whom was only seven. We had fled the civil war in Côte d’Ivoire and arrived in Senegal in November 2002. Shortly after, my mother left for the U.S. to seek asylum for herself and for us. We would not see her again for three years. During that time, our father was largely absent, traveling frequently for work. What I remember most from that period is not just the overwhelming responsibility, but the profound absence of both parents—leaving me with a deep sense of abandonment that I still carry awkwardly in adulthood.

i am (not) your mother is a confrontation of the trauma I experienced during my teenage years and how it continues to shape my relationship with my mother. It is an attempt to process the complex feelings I have towards her —an unsteady mix of hurt, resentment, admiration, and love. The work interweaves documentary photography, archival family images, journal entries, and transcribed conversations with my mother.

The book has won the Juror’s Special Mention from the 2024 Paris Photo–Aperture PhotoBook Awards. It was on view at Paris Photo from 7 - 10 November 2024 and will travel to Printed Matter in New York in January 2025.